BrokenEchoes

  I keep happy memories of you They are with me always Folded small, and nestled together In an envelope in my hip pocket It comforts me to have them To know they are within reach When days are rough and I feel low Touching the envelope reminds me Of joyful remembrances I have  Won’t it be nice when joy finds me again Other days require more I empty the paper container Spread and unfold my remnants of you I sit with them, spend time with them And with your help, somehow, I make it through

  The world is waking up from the cold night of winter Redbuds and dogwoods bloom Bringing a streak of cooler days But reminding us of the coming summer Or warning us The hills grow greener each day Grass is growing, causing an intermittent buzz of mowers It harmonizes with the buzz of insects increasing activity They crawl and fly and drone incessantly Birds are singing more and more Snakes and spiders and small mammals awaken and wander Seed are being planted, watered, and cared for Gardens are being planned, prepared, and implemented Warm clothes have been packed away Spring is here and the days are growing longer I thought they were long enough  

  We left church after dark On a cool October evening We made our way down the concrete steps Toward the step-side Chevy Father was exceedingly proud of it Blood red glinting in the moonlight There was an older gentleman Gaunt and grey and stooped I could tell that he needed help He was uncertain on the steep stairs Searching furtively for the next one Shaking arms on the railing “Help him,” I implored my father He looked angrily into my eyes Then he walked on He offered the elder no aid I had never been more disappointed My father knowingly refused to help He continued to the truck uncaring The old man likely never crosses his mind I recall that event often That evening I learned an important lesson I had put too much faith in my father He was just a man  

  When I was offered a bowl of flame I drank eagerly There was a promise of havoc And I had a thirst for chaos I yearned for any novelty Any disruption to this mundane survival So I drained the blazing vessel And dashed it to shards on the floor I readied myself for excitement that did not come The wildfire spread within me, but quickly Dwindled to a burnt-out smolder Ashes coated my guts  My bones were soot-blackened I should never have expected more I returned with disappointment to my empty existence.  

  I have been outside too long Time to slink back to my cave It is cold and damp and dark There is only room enough for me The sun is too hot on my skin Its blinding brightness causes my eyes to ache I crave the cool comfort of my cavern There is only room enough for me I am not built for this scorched land I need constant shade and drink My dug-out chamber is just how I like it And there is only room enough for me  

  The rest of the world went to sleep an hour ago We watched it turn in from our porch swing We share the cloudless night  With a soft buzz of frogs and crickets I like it when the world gets quiet And we can steal a still moment together I like it when the night is newly set And we can watch the lightning bugs for a bit I like it when the air has just a touch of chill And you snuggle a little closer on the porch swing

Take a moment and look around See where we are Think back to where we started We have come so far We have done so much We have helped so many We have had wins and losses Good days and bad Days when I fell, and you helped me stand Days when we supported each other Navigating rocky terrain Days when we lost our way And drifted along together for a time I would not have made it this far If you were not with me I am thankful we are making this journey together